Today I dropped both kids off at a kids fitness class at the rec and I *gasp* kissed them both goodbye and headed off to the track for a stroller run with the baby. I was the ONLY mom who did that. Stated in the description of the class was that it was without caregivers and I checked with the instructor who said, "have a great run!" I probably sprinted out of that room without even a sideways glance. I had an excellent run with my littlest, enjoyed some silent time, and was able to get back into class with five minutes left in the lesson. The kids AND moms were all doing the parachute together. Part of me really wanted to feel guilty about not "helping out'. Part of me wanted to chide myself that I missed an opportunity to see the children enjoying themselves. Part of me wanted to feel contempt on the faces of the other moms that I "deserted" my kids to do something for myself. Then I thought back to similar class at the YMCA when I only had one kid. Same deal, I dropped him off, and headed out the door to enjoy a solo workout. When I returned, I was once again the only parent out of at least 15 who left their kid in a class that was listed as no caregiver necessary. After that one class, I stayed in the class with my son for the rest of the sessions and was really internally mad about it. Somehow I deluded myself into thinking that if these other parents felt the need to be with their child that I must do the same. Was I naive!
Mind you, I am not here to bash those of you who attend their children's lessons, games, events, just in my perspective, I feel that there is an unsaid sentiment that we cannot leave and that those of us who do are wrong.
I don't know where this need to feel that we have to be within arms reach of our children at all times became so prevalent. Most moms I talk to would relish 40 minutes child-free and seem almost desperate to have that time to themselves. Personally, I am over feeling guilty for not doing things "traditionally" in today's world. Looking back at many of my posts when I was a new mother outlines this struggle to conform to the standards of parenting when I did not feel comfortable doing so. My own skin is very comfortable and realizing this allows me to grow in confidence I am doing what is right by my own family. I am only hoping to see some of those other mother's on the track with me next week. Wouldn't that be the real gift?
Thursday, March 12, 2015
Monday, March 9, 2015
Third Eye Blind
I'm looking at this blinking cursor damning myself for even attempting to write a blog post when even a simple tweet is impossible to do these days. Now with three kids four and younger, time management is truly an art form that I find I seriously lack, but that is a whole 'nother blog post. I just have some simple thoughts on the poor status of my dear third child. Mo is definitely an easy-going, patient baby boy and lord knows he absolutely has to be with so much chaos going on everyday. Cliches do ring true with subsequent children especially since it is hard to divide ones already short attentions span by three.
1. They have to cry. Alot. Much to any grandparent's chagrin, a third baby does have to wait more often than his siblings for food, naps, baths, and playtime. I know this seems cruel and harsh to make a baby cry and I will always attend to his needs, but when your two year old is coloring on the walls (again) and your four year old is running laps around your kitchen at breakneck speed, the baby has to be put down to attempt to resume some sort of control.
2. When you do have time, they get lots of extra snuggles. The baby of the family knows they are the baby of the family from day one as exhausted parents wave the white flag at fertility and take the time to embrace each of those tender moments. Freshly bathed smiles, messy pureed food faces, sweet smiles in their sleep are all cherished moments that we do stop and soak in.
3. Germs are a family affair. I am still a self proclaimed germaphobe and will do whatever I can to protect our family from the outside. Once one of those sicky suckers enters the house its hard as hell to keep three kids wrangled far enough from one another NOT to share germs. My firstborn was 11 months before his first cold, my second, about 6 months. My baby has basically been sick off and on since he was 2 months old. One day he will thank me for it.
4. Attention whore. The baby knows that there is a long line of energy zappers ahead of him so he is loud, cute, and amicable with everyone. I'm not one for enjoying the shrieking baby but I get that he has to be obnoxious to draw the attention away from the talkers int his family. And when he has your attention, he will pull out all of the cuteness stops to keep you there.
5. The baby is probably the most loved one of all. No, not in the since of picking favorites or anything, just the fact he has two parents and two siblings who cannot wait to dote all over him Hence the spread of the germies but well worth it to see the gummy smile he gives his older sibs.
1. They have to cry. Alot. Much to any grandparent's chagrin, a third baby does have to wait more often than his siblings for food, naps, baths, and playtime. I know this seems cruel and harsh to make a baby cry and I will always attend to his needs, but when your two year old is coloring on the walls (again) and your four year old is running laps around your kitchen at breakneck speed, the baby has to be put down to attempt to resume some sort of control.
2. When you do have time, they get lots of extra snuggles. The baby of the family knows they are the baby of the family from day one as exhausted parents wave the white flag at fertility and take the time to embrace each of those tender moments. Freshly bathed smiles, messy pureed food faces, sweet smiles in their sleep are all cherished moments that we do stop and soak in.
3. Germs are a family affair. I am still a self proclaimed germaphobe and will do whatever I can to protect our family from the outside. Once one of those sicky suckers enters the house its hard as hell to keep three kids wrangled far enough from one another NOT to share germs. My firstborn was 11 months before his first cold, my second, about 6 months. My baby has basically been sick off and on since he was 2 months old. One day he will thank me for it.
4. Attention whore. The baby knows that there is a long line of energy zappers ahead of him so he is loud, cute, and amicable with everyone. I'm not one for enjoying the shrieking baby but I get that he has to be obnoxious to draw the attention away from the talkers int his family. And when he has your attention, he will pull out all of the cuteness stops to keep you there.
5. The baby is probably the most loved one of all. No, not in the since of picking favorites or anything, just the fact he has two parents and two siblings who cannot wait to dote all over him Hence the spread of the germies but well worth it to see the gummy smile he gives his older sibs.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)